Another Week, Another Friday

FRIDAY FREE-FOR-ALL aka Friday Crazies
No, I don't have special plans for the weekend.  Weekends are a lot like weekdays around here.  Just because it's Saturday or Sunday or even Friday evening, one day is much the same as others.  I work, no matter what day it is.  Now that Game of Thrones has finished its fourth season, I don't even have a MUST-WATCH TV show.

The grass needs mowing.  Thanks to the rain we've had, the backyard is a jungle.  Last Saturday, I pulled and cut the bigger weeds, in hope that we might get to actually mow at some point.  Yesterday we replaced the primer cap on the mower - - - that's the little button that has to be pushed to prime a pull-cord type mower so it will start - - - and it still won't start.  But the Weed Eater is working again, now that it has new line, so we might manage to blaze a trail of some kind through the jungle.  I'm not holding my breath.  Temps are expected to be in the 90s, with humidity to match.  Ugh.

New neighbors--or maybe only one--to the south of us are making life, well, interesting.  A pitbull has been ensconced in the backyard there, complete with small dog house.  That would be well and good, but the poor dog is attached to a leash, giving him little freedom.  Not to mention that I learned yesterday that it's illegal in this fair city for a dog to be tied up for more than an hour, four times a day.  This dog has been tied up 24/7 for 2 1/2 days.  I had to find out from the neighbor to the south of my south neighbor that anyone was actually living in the house.  I don't make a habit of clocking the habits of neighbors or even knowing who they are.  I rarely saw anyone there, but when I did, it was often at the strangest times---3:30 a.m., mostly, when headlights from a car pulled into the driveway, which would shine in my bedroom window.  In spite of several Facebook friends thinking it might be a drug house, the new neighbor is an older Hispanic woman who doesn't drive and obviously never steps out of the house, either. le sigh

Let me make it clear.  I like dogs.  We have a dog, too, but Max the Pekingese isn't all that crazy about
going outside, especially when it's raining, snowing, hot or the grass is tall. When he does allow us to boot him out, we then have to carry him back in, especially at midnight.  Max is L A Z Y and S P O I L E D.  The dog next door is tied to his dog house ALL THE TIME.  Said dog also isn't crazy about being left alone ALL THE TIME, so barks, moans, whines, and every other sound imaginable ALL THE TIME.  The past two nights have meant being awakened far too often by the barks and whines of the dog.  And I've yet to see anyone in the backyard to check on him.  Do I call the authorities and report this?  Or maybe I should simply leave a copy of the City Law that states New Ordinance Makes it a Crime to Keep Your Dog on a Chain 24/7" in the door for someone to find.  I'm about to set the dog free, when no one is looking.  However, I'm not sure how friendly the dog is or isn't.

So it's summer and it's Friday.  I'm a few pages from finishing a new manuscript.  I need to get busy on plotting a new series for Harlequin American, set in a Texas ghost town.  But my #3 daughter and her hubby are stopping by this evening with a present for me.  They consider it a present.  I consider it one more mouth to feed.  A couple of weeks ago, said daughter picked up her cat Tosca, who's been living with me for the past several years, since daughter couldn't have a cat where she lived, and they're now living at least 2 hours away.  Yes, I'll miss Tosca, but she tends to keep to herself and she apparently is enjoying her new home and humans.  So daughter has decided to give me one of the kittens born in one of the race cars at the shop. (Her hubby is a race car driver.)  Just what I need, right?

There's a problem with new kitty.  He's a he and will have to be, um, fixed.  And daughter named all the kittens after candy bars.  (Yes, I'm serious.)  This particular kitty was named Kondike.  Yeah, like a Konkdike Bar, which is actually ice cream, not a candy bar.  I decided to name him Dave.  Yes, Dave.  My youngest daughter is having a fit.  PETS CANNOT BE GIVEN HUMAN NAMES.  Which isn't exactly true, since Toby, her cat, has a human name.  She wanted me to name the new kitten DaVinci, which is how the name Dave came to be.  Or Tyrion, seeing that I'm a GoT and Peter Dinklage fan.  Or anything but Dave.  #3 daughter says I can name kitten whatever I want.  Her hubby likes Dave Kondike, Used Car Salesman.  They're the ones who gave me a fish for my birthday and named him Charlie Manson.  Creative, aren't they?

Let's face it.  There's never a dull moment here.  Four daughters, each with her own distinctive personality, always make life interesting.  And if they should fail, humanity will always fill in.

Best wishes to anyone who has bothered to slog through this rambling mess.  Have a wonderful weekend!!  Pics of Dave Kondike, Used Car Salesman will be posted on Monday.  I hope. ;)

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter. ~ Mark Twain

Summer!! Or Good Enough, At Least

FRIDAY FREE-FOR-ALL
I'll be honest.  I have no idea what I'm blogging about today.  I'm simply happy that school is out and summer vacation has officially begun today.

Taking a quick look out the window, it would be difficult to call it summer.  The sky is overcast, leftover from early morning storms, and the temperature, which reached into the low 90s yesterday, is just under 70.  I have no doubt that will quickly change by tomorrow.  But we need the rain here, and there's no reason not to welcome a cool day.  After all, we already passed 100 earlier this month.

Mallory, the youngest of my four, and I spent much of yesterday attending graduation ceremonies.  (Two of my grands, her nieces.)  The first was youngest granddaughter Payton's Pre-K.  The class presented parents and friends with songs they'd learned over this school year.  I especially liked the "Five Little Monkees Jumping On the Bed" song.  It reminded me of my own girls' days in Brownie and Girl Scouts.





The little guy on the left in the light blue shirt was a showman and such a cutie.  When one of the songs was over, he turned to his mom (blonde, in white shirt) and said, "Take a picture of me, Mom."  He was obviously proud, as well he should be.  They all should.  After all, they came away from the year with nifty songs, knowing their alphabet and able to count, and especially how to get along in a classroom of their peers.  A step in the right direction!







All the kids seemed to understand how special the day was for them and their families.  Smiles abounded, giggles and squeals filled the room.  These kids were excited!




A little over an hour later, we were back at the school for Payton's older sister's graduation from 5th grade.  While the Pre-Kers had been in a party mood, the older group understood what this day meant for them.  Grade school would be a memory, when the doors to middle school open in the fall.  Many of them had spent the past six years together, growing and learning.  A video presentation at the end of the ceremony of random shots of the students in classrooms and on the playground was followed by a beautiful rendition of Katie Perry's Roar filling the auditorium.  These kids understood that they're were stepping out of one stage of life into the next.

The last group of four to receive their diplomas stood patiently in line.  That's Allie, waiting her turn to get her Certificate of Promotion.

 It's hard to believe that it wasn't all that long ago that Allie was finishing Pre-K and then Kindergarten.  She's growing up into a fine young woman, and I hope she weathers middle school well.  From my own memories, it's the worst of all the stepping stones of education.

The graduates listened to a memorable speech by the Operations Division Director of the City schools, and he presented each one of them with a special gift:  A small, flat black stone, like the one he had carried throughout his own school years and still kept as a reminder of how far he'd come and the wonderful gifts in his life--his family.

And of course these are the years of giggling girls and selfies.  How lucky we are that technology has given us instant photos to keep that will remain as memories in our hearts for years.  Let's hope these girls all remember the good times they had in grade school as they walk, sail, and fly through their lives.

Then it was over.  Another year, another two graduations.  Last year it was oldest granddaughter Scarlett (our ice-skater) from 5th grade, and youngest grandson Jaxon's graduation from Kindergarten.  Next year will be another two.  Gavin from 5th and Payton from Kindergarten.  It's like stepping stones.  Before we know it, we'll have three 8th grade graduations in a row, and then will come high school.

The years go quickly.  Too quickly, most of us would say.  Each year brings new memories for us to treasure.  How lucky is that?

HAPPY SUMMER!

Life is all memory, except for the one present moment that goes by you so quickly you hardly catch it going. ~ Tennessee Williams

The Aftermath of a Productive Weekend

MONDAY MADNESS
"The best laid plans of mice and men..." 

That's the beginning of a line in Robert Burn's poem, "To a Mouse, on Turning Her Up in Her Nest with the Plough," and often describes my weekend plans.

Not this past weekend.

In fact, the weekend was more productive than most and considerably more satisfying.  I had a list.  Not a long list, only four items.  For once, I didn't go mad and overdo, which leads to disappointment in myself.  No, this one was simple.

A load of laundry and several loads of dishes on Friday (we've been saving up *wink*), followed by the replacement of a light switch on Saturday morning.  Yes, I'm a handy little devil.  Or would be if I had done it right.  Unfortunately, I didn't, but neither did I cause a flash fire.  That's a win.  And, after a little more research, I discovered what I needed to do, so it now reappears on my list of chores-for-later-in-the-week.  No need to push it.  The light hasn't worked for some time.  A few more days won't matter.  Live and learn, right?  The last of the errant dishes---how do they manage to meander into other rooms?---were done, and I moved on to finish some small updates on my website.  Not a lot of work, but everything on the list crossed off.  Well, except for that light switch, but that's covered.

There was also the editing of the first three chapters of what will (I hope) be the first of a series of books that I wrote in the spring a year ago.  The tentative series name is The Divine Misfits.  Maybe.  We'll see how that goes.  So what if there are still  eleven chapters to go?  It's begun and, with luck, will be finished by Sunday.  That's the plan.

This feeling of accomplishment is rare, and I think I've discovered the secret.  Of course, most everyone but me knows that secret.  I'm a little slow on the uptake.  And what is it?  Don't overload yourself with trying to do too much!  Obviously my goal setting has weak spots.  But I'm working on that.  When it comes to writing, it isn't difficult.  When it comes to normal, everyday life, yeah, there are problems.

Yesterday (Sunday) was good, especially because it was our writers group meeting.  A week later than usual, thanks to Mother's Day, so even more welcome.  There's nothing like getting together with like-minded and wonderful friends.  I could do this all the time!  And with a handful of us vowing to meet for critiquing once a week, it's all good.  I'm pumped.  But I'm also trying not to get over-pumped.  That leads to downfall.  So it's take one small thing at a time and enjoy.

I'm learning new things.  I'm reading blogs, books, articles and whatever appears as a gift from the Universe to see life in a different way.  I like to call myself a realist, but over the years, I've become more pessimistic.  If something good happened (and it does), it was easier to say it was a fluke.  Now I'm trying to expect the good stuff.  Why not?  Shouldn't we choose the good over the bad?  I mean, if we have a choice---which we do---let's choose not only good, but great!  I like that.  I really do.  (Doing some weird Sally Field channeling here.)

Yes, there are a million things that need to be done to get the things in my life in line to the way I want it.  But they can't all be done in a day, a weekend, or even a week.  They take time.  And time is often our enemy.  Instead, let's make it our friend.  Don't overload yourself with trying to do too much!  Yes, it's definitely worth repeating.  And now that I know the secret...

In the end, what I got from all this was that I could have the best of both worlds:  Getting things done AND enjoying the weekend.  What could be better than that?  There's still laundry to be done, winter clothes to wash, dry, fold, pack away until the weather turns cold again.  Small closets and not enough drawer space means everything can't always be at hand.  That's okay.  We understand it.  It's become a tradition to start mentioning it as the weather begins to change, and finally saying, "Let's get it done today."  There's still the office that could use a bulldozer, but it, too, will be done in small doses and chunks.  Why not?  It isn't going anywhere on its own.  Lots of sort and toss and store...and finding new places to store.  Just how many file folders need to be on hand at all times?

In a few days, school will be out, and this summer may be unlike the past nine summers, filled with grandkids bickering and running crazy, trips to the library and trying to find enough food to please and fill up five growing youngsters.  I need the break.  I deserve the break.  (See that positive there?)  I want to enjoy this time.  It's MY TURN.  (Please pass that on to my offspring.)

Monday Madness will remain as it's called, only because it's MONDAY, but there'll be some small changes.  Change is good.  Change is healthy.  Change is fun!  One day at a time.  One step at a time.  And, hey, I might actually become that productive person I dream of being?

How was your weekend?  Did you have (TAKE!) the opportunity to make it a good one?  Or would you like to climb out of the rut?  Let's take the road together and see where it takes us, pitfalls and all, because there will always be those...unless we live on a faraway island where no one can find us.

Check back next week and see if this new positive course continues to work.  Yes, there will be a failure here and there, but focusing on the successes will take care of those, right?  And next week I'll share some links I've discovered that are helping me along my way.  Maybe you'll find something helpful, too.!

"The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential... these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence."  ~  Confucius

Monday Dreary or Dreaming?

MONDAY MUSINGS

 From a collection of photos of origami boats by Victor Eredel.

Spring.  Rain.  And in my little corner of the world, that can also mean storms and possible tornadoes.  We're keeping an eye on the middle of the week for those.

Somehow we escaped the original forecast of a rainy Easter.  I spent the day inside anyway and found the top of my desk.  I now have a box of papers to sort and file.  The truth is, I need a system to make finding things easier.  With three of my four daughters and their offspring and hubby/SO off to share the day with their dad and his wife, the house was silent.  I don't mind the quiet.  In fact, I invite it.

In fact, the entire weekend proved semi-productive.  I started work on a new website design (for myself!), but shelved it.  The ideas weren't coming as easily as I'd hoped.  Much of both days tended toward learning and introspection.  No deadline is looming--except for the need to dive farther into a new book proposal--and family demands were at a low.  It was a Me Weekend, for the most part, and although I didn't do anything earth-shattering, I'd rank it at an 8 of 10.  There aren't a lot of those.

Having a day or two without demands and requests from others is a gift.  It doesn't happen often, so when it does, I start out not knowing how I should spend the time.  While I didn't get everything done that I should have, I also didn't scold myself for the things left undone.

I caught up on the TV show Cosmos and watched last night's episode of Game of Thrones.  The two are on at the same time, but where there's a will, there's a way, and I watch Cosmos later online, when time allows.  Yesterday allowed it.  Another gift to be thankful for.

I finished the weekend with a short list of "me" things to do this morning, the first being this blog.  The other two are personal things I've begun working on, such as making time for myself, making life more positive, learning how to become a more positive person, and simply enjoying a small part of each day.  A phone call from a friend completed the evening.

All in all, the weekend was enjoyable, and I look forward to the next one.  Plans for that one include the possibility of rearranging my office, which will eventually lead to painting my desk and purging the myriad of boxes of who knows what that fill much of the space in the room.  My mother's habit of hoarding got its hook in me at an early age, but that story is for another time.

The sun is peeking through the clouds, so maybe the chance of the rain sticking around is over, at least for a while.  The day is new and bright.  Let's make it a special one.

As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round. ~ Ben Hogan

Refilling the Well

FRIDAY FREE-FOR-ALL
We all have responsibilities.  For women, that often includes the usual human things, such as eating, cleaning, looking out for our bodies and more.  Some women are married and stay-at-home wives, while some work outside the home, in addition to the usual in-home chores of life.  Some women are single and look out for themselves.  They clean, they shop, they cook, and they are responsible for only themselves.  Some women, single or married, add children to the equation.

We are nurturers.  We take care of others--husbands, children, parents, siblings and friends--while juggling all the other facets of life.  Sometimes we become so immersed in those things that we forget about ourselves.

Being a single mother with grown children and young grandchildren, my attention is focused on them, while still finding time of my own, as I try to balance work, play, and the inevitable checkbook.  It's easier, now that my four daughters are grown, but once a mom, always a mom.  I do what I can, when I can.  If I can't, I worry that I'm not being the mother I should be.  And then I remind myself that it's my time.  Not all of it is mine, but the others can take care of themselves.  After all, they're the moms now.

The first time I heard the term Refilling the Well, I was already writing and in the midst of working toward publication.  I was married, with four children, so demands on my time were natural for any woman in that same place in life.  We give of ourselves and often forget that we need time to regroup, to kick back for a little while and become who we are, other than wives, employees, mothers, cooks, cleaner-uppers, caretakers and all those other things we do because that's who we are.  After all that giving, we sometimes feel depleted of energy, time, and--dare I say it?--giving to others.  We need a little time to take a breath and think of ourselves and find way to remind us that we, too, are special.  That's what Refilling the Well is.

Why do we need to refill our wells?  Because if we don't, we might fall into the trap of not caring about ourselves.  If that happens, we might endanger our caring for others.

So how do we refill our wells?  We give ourselves the gift of time.  Our time.  No rushing Junior (or Juniorette, in my case) to ball practice or spending every spare minute that isn't taken up by all the have-to's in life by giving to others.  We don't fill those spare moments with organizing the pantry or polishing the baseboards in our house.  Well, not unless that's something that makes us happy and takes a special place in our hearts.

5 Ways to Spend Time Alone (And 14 Inspirational Quotes about Solitude)

Make a list of the small things you can do for just yourself.  A long bubble bath?  Reading?  Watching a movie we've always wanted to see?  Kicking back and listening to music we enjoy?  Spending time with a close friend or several friends?  Taking a long walk in a peaceful spot?  Watch the water in a pond or even something as simple as sitting outside on a nice day, enjoying the weather?  What one thing can you do for yourself that will take you away from everyday life and, especially, make you smile?

I used to be an avid reader.  I could read 3-5 books a week, depending on the length of them.  Reading is still what I do when I have a few minutes of quiet, uninterrupted time to put aside the demands of work, family, and home.  But too often theses days, I find myself not reading for pleasure, only for knowledge and instructions, even though my Kindle and bookshelves are filled with all kinds of fiction!  Guess what one of the things will go on my list?

With luck, I'll also be spending time with friends this weekend.  I'm looking forward to and excited about our writers group's upcoming mini-retreat this weekend.  Eight hours of talking writing, brainstorming, helping each other, laughing and sharing.  I'll spend the day with people who share my love of writing.  (The photo above was taken at our Fall Mini-Retreat last year.  While the mini-retreat is "job" related, it never feels that it is.  Many of us in the group are friends, outside of the group.  We're there for each other when times are bad or when we have something to celebrate.  We might get together for dinner out, and we've even been known to take in a movie together!

How often should we refill our wells?  As often as possible!   Ideally, that would be every day.  That's not often possible, so let's go for once a week.  If that doesn't work, how about once a month, or quarterly?  Or whenever the opportunity presents itself and especially when we're feeling depleted. Don't say no to an invitation from a friend to do something together or simply get together, unless it's absolutely necessary.  Don't feel selfish or that you're wasting your time.  We all need to do things we enjoy, in addition to the requirements in our life.

Why You Shouldn't Feel Guilty About Stealing a Little Time for Yourself (Psychology Today)

Refill the Well whenever you can.  Whenever the opportunity presents itself.  It doesn't have to be planned out in advance.  It can be done on the spur of the moment, when a small amount of time is presented.  Leave the dishes and vacuuming for a little later.  Give yourself the gift of time.

Enjoy your weekend, and if you get the chance to refill your well, take it!

I think you have to refill the well at some point. ~ Skeet Ulrich

My Dream Vacation

FRIDAY FANTASY

This is how it starts.  My dream vacation.  On Amtrak.

While many people would choose to fly, I want to see things along the way, not just clouds.  Driving would work.  That's the way it was done when I was growing up.  Our family vacations were often two weeks, and stopped at all kinds of places on the way.  My mother enjoyed waterfalls and caves.  We stopped at them all.  I swear we did.  After a while, one waterfall looked much like the last one, at least to me.  The same for caves, mountains, and the usual nature things.  But I did see a lot of this glorious country.  Looking back to those long ago decades, I wouldn't trade them for anything.

I want to do it by train.  I'll start out by travelling to Chicago, the real point of departure to my trip back into history.  With luck, I'll take my youngest daughter with me.  The others have responsibilities.  We don't.  Of course that isn't true, but they've had the advantage of being older and traveled some before baby sister was born.  It's her turn now.

After a quick tour of Chicago (I was there in 1999 and saw virtually nothing), we'll travel to Boston.  I already have a list of things to see and do.  In no special order:

• Old North Church
• Boston Harbor
• Beacon Hill
• Boston Athenaeum, the oldest, largest, independent, private library in the U.S.
• Boston Commons
• Boston Light, 2nd oldest lighthouse in the U.S
• Fareuil Hall
• Freedom Trail
• Harvard

My oldest visited Boston a few years ago.  A work-related trip, she didn't get to see much.  In fact, it was so late and so dark, they weren't sure where they were.  Come to find out, the were behind Old North Church, where dog tags of veterans hang.  It took some time for them to realize that, and also to discover they'd also driven by Harvard Library.

After Boston?  We'll ride on to the Big Apple.  New York City.  I've been there twice.  The first time with my parents in 1964. I was a preteen and remember Radio City Music Hall, climbing the winding iron steps to the crown of the Statue of Liberty, the U.N.,and going to the 1964 World's Fair.  We stayed at the historic Plaza Hotel, across the street from Central Park.  My second trip was in 2003, and I can now proudly say that I managed to navigate the subway and even rode it on my own aka no friends along.  The subway took me from near the hotel where I stayed to Ground Zero and three blocks away to Harlequin NY Headquarters at the historic Woolworth Building.


This dream trip will include the following:

• Empire State Building
• Statue of Liberty
• Grand Central Terminal (a given, since riding the train)
• Rockefeller Center
• Radio City Music Hall
• Broadway & Times Square
• The Neighborhoods of Lower Manhattan
• The World Trade Center Site, because I saw it in 2003 when it was Ground Zero.
• And SHOPPING!

After NYC, we'll travel south to Philadelphia, the cradle of our democracy.  By now my feet will be hurting, but the things to see will far outweigh a few blisters.

• The Franklin Institute
• Liberty Bell Center
• Independence Hall
• Old Pine Street Presbyterian Church
• National Constitution Center
• Everything possible on Independence Mall

Last stop of the trip.  Washington, DC.  This is a can't miss.  I've been there twice, the first visit as a small child.  All I remember is the Lincoln Memorial, so the trip in 2000 with Kathie and Charlie DeNosky was a joy.  I had the opportunity on this second visit to break out of my mold of not straying at the RWA Conference hotel and do a little sightseeing.  I hopped on the Metro, but forgot my camera, with a zipped storage bag of momentos.  My destination?  The National Mall, and especially The Wall.  This dream time will include many, many more things to see.

• The entire Washington Mall:  Vietnam Memorial, Korean War Memorial (an absolute must-see, breathtaking memorial), Lincoln Memorial, Jefferson Memorial, WWII Memorial, Washington Monument
• The Smithsonian
• The Capitol
• The White House
• Every other memorial on the National Mall
• Holocaust Museum

Then comes the trip home, and I haven't decided which kind of transportation we'll use.  That will come later.  Whatever it is, we'll need time to digest all the wonderful and historic places we've seen.

Do you see a pattern in my choices?  DC, Philly and Boston?  The places mentioned in those three cities were part of the movie, National Treasure.  I through NYC in there, because why miss something when you're that close?

Will we ever take this trip.  Yes!  I don't know when, but I do know we will.  But first we'll need to watch National Treasure and National Treasure 2 again, for a brush-up.  Then do some studying.  History will come to life.

Who wants to come along?

Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossible before they were done. ~ Louis D. Brandeis

It's Not What You Think

No, I was not on vacation last week, although I truly wish I had been.  Sometimes work and deadlines and family completely take over life, and other things must take a backseat.  In fact, I shouldn't even be here writing a blog.  I should be working, but my conscience is bothering me, so, well, here I am.

It's a good thing February is a short month.  By the weekend, we'll have run the four weeks of the second month of this new year and be on our way to what will hopefully be spring.

Does anyone remember Spring?

We've been on a long run of cold and ultra-cold this winter.  Polar Vortexes, included.  I'm yearning for warm.  Not hot, mind you, but a nice 75-80 degrees to thaw my feet, hands, nose...  On the other hand, as I complain about the cold, and the snow, and the sub-zero temps, I realize that it could have been worse.  I could live in the Northeast. ;)  Blessings to all of you who have had a rough winter.  May you thaw quickly and soon!

I'm impatiently waiting to see the first green buds on trees.  They will come, as they always do each year, but sometimes the wait seems eternal.  Spring, it's been said, is eternal, but this year I'd have to say that Winter has been.  This week is supposed to be another cold one.  Not frigid, as some of them in the past couple of months have been, but still cold enough to wish for a few more days of 60 degrees, when a jacket is all that's needed.  I'm more than ready to put away the long, down coat, gloves, three pairs of socks and the rest of the layering.  I yearn to sit barefoot at my computer.  If I tried that now, I'd have a severe case of frostbite.  I'll even try to be grateful when my 6" fan, buzzing away on my desk, is needed to keep me cool.  And I know it won't be long until I'm complaining about unstable weather and threats of tornadoes, along with power outages.  Although I hope this year those outages don't cause another computer monitor to die.  Which reminds me, I need to find a chimney for my oil lamp.  One more thing to add to an ever-growing list of needs, thanks to the weather.

As I sit here, I gaze longingly at the photo above.  How I would love to have a hammock, where I could rest and dream!  I've been so busy, even dreaming has crowded into that backseat with work and deadlines and family.  But I have given myself permission to watch college basketball.  Our beloved WSU Shockers are now the only undefeated team in the nation.  I'm convinced that's the only thing that has kept me from complete insanity.

Oh, have no fear.  By May I'll be whining about storms and tornadoes.  By mid July it will be the heat.  By August it will be the need for school to start again.  If only I could learn how to accept and enjoy each season, each turn in life as it speeds by, faster and faster.  Maybe I'll work on that...when  spring arrives.  And maybe, if I'm really, really lucky, I'll get a vacation, even if it's a working vacation.

Now back to trying to dream about that hammock and the beautiful beach with a gentle, cooling, tropical breeze...  Dream on!

I'd like to dial it back 5% or 10% and try to have a vacation that's not just e-mail with a view. ~ Elon Musk

Short On Time

There's never enough, is there?  Time, I mean.  We're given 60 minutes for an hour, 24 hours in a day, 7 days in a week, 52 weeks/365 days in a year, and yet there's never enough time for everything.

I have a mental list of all the things I want to do "when I have time."  That list grows longer, not shorter.  It doesn't include the dreams.  The vacations in a warm spot, with a beach and sunshine.  (I'm really tired of wearing 2 shirts, 2 pairs of pants, and 3 pairs of socks to keep warm...while sitting at my desk!)  And I really should put that list in my head on a piece of paper.  The trouble is, I'd probably lose it.  One of those things at the top of my list is to declutter my office.  It's not happening. :(

The fact is, right now I should be working on one of three deadlines.  One is small, one is medium, and the other is much bigger.  The small one is due ASAP or by Friday at the latest.  It shouldn't take all that much time.  I have a Dear Reader letter to write for my August book, along with a dedication.  I know what they'll both be about, but the difficulty is setting aside the time to do it.  The medium one is to finish reading through the proofs for that same book.  It takes some time, making sure everything is as perfect as possible.  (It's never perfect.  We're human.)  I have two chapters and an epilogue left to go through.  It's due next Tuesday.  And the there's the much bigger one:  Finish the book!  Or rather editing and polishing the book.  At least the first draft is written.  February 24th--that's less than two weeks away!--is the deadline for the full manuscript (entire book) for the last book in my Desperation, Oklahoma, series, which will hit shelves sometime early next year.  Hey, I'm trying.

The above are only writing deadlines.  Then there's life.  Pay bills, pick up a washer cartridges for two dripping faucets, declutter my office...after writing deadlines are met, buy groceries, fix meals, do some laundry so I actually have clean clothes.  Just the normal stuff.  Oh, and there are still taxes to do and send to the IRS.  Add to all that the 3-4 trips to schools during the week, and two upcoming no-school days next week.  Really?  I mean, REALLY!  Can we add a few more things to the Have-To's?

So what do I end up doing?  Watching basketball games and staying up much later to work on writing deadlines at night than I should, i.e. skipping much needed sleep.  My beloved Wichita State University Shockers are 26-0, one of only two unbeaten teams in the NCAA.  Only five more games to go.  And then my Kansas State University Wildcats are a must see...even though I forgot and missed the biggest game of the year on Monday, the second rivalry game of the year, KSU v. KU (University of Kansas).  And KSU won!!!!  Even though I knew the final score, I watched the whole game yesterday online. ;) Yes, I should have been working. :(

I've already given up two of the few television shows I usually watch.  I haven't seen one episode of this season's DOWNTON ABBEY, and I'm way behind on PARENTHOOD.  Except for basketball, there are only three shows (and the one CNN: The British Invasion special) that I've watched over the past month or so.  Do I miss watching TV?  Sometimes, but I'll find a way via online or other to catch up, if I feel the need.

When time is short, we have to set priorities.  We have to give up some of the things that are important to us.  Believe me, a little down time is needed to get through life, as it is, so giving up some of it is almost painful.  Yet following our dream is important, too.  Yes, work is what pays the bills, whether we love our jobs or not, so it can't be ignored.  Those other things can, at least for a little while.  There will be time, later, to enjoy the good things, too.  Or at least I hope there will be!

I'm off to work on those priorities, those deadlines.  Hope all is well in your world and you're getting done what needs to be done, yet still having a little "playtime!"

Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work. ~ H. L. Hunt

Oh, (S)No(w)!

MONDAY MADNESS aka MONDAY MEMORIES

Seriously?!

As I posted on Facebook this morning...

Dear Mother Nature,

What the (fill in the blank)?

Yes, I know February is one of the winter months.  I expect cold and even snow.  But the past week has netted us 13 inches of the white stuff.  9 inches last Tuesday, which had not melted away, only melted a little and froze...harder and harder throughout the week.  And now another 4+ inches over night.  One sweep of the car with a broom last week was quite enough.  This morning invited another, and I had no excuse not to accept.

I'll admit that snow can be pretty.  I've seen the beauty of Jack Frost's artistry.  But I'd really rather see it in pictures, not deal with the stuff.  My three oldest daughters and I once spent five hours sitting on a country road, two miles from home, and no way to get there, thanks to an unexpected blizzard.  The road grader/snowplow had gotten stuck, and five cars full of neighbors and friends, including ours, sat and waited, while he hoped help would arrive while we tried to stay warm.

At that time, my girls were 3, 5, and 7.  I'd left work early and picked them up at the babysitter, then drove ten miles farther--sliding sideways once--to meet their dad at a small gas station.  The plan was to follow him and the road grader.  Until the road grader got stuck.  And so did all of us who thought we were smart by follow the snowplow.  Uh, no.

We had no snacks, no drinks, and just enough gas to keep the car warm enough so we wouldn't freeze.  After four hours of waiting, we all walked more than half a mile to the closest neighbor's house.  They offered all us warmth and friendship, fixed us sandwiches and drinks, and assured us that help was on the way.  Help came from two other neighbors, who drove their four-wheel-drive tractors and picked us up to take us home, when they could have stayed snug and warm in their own homes.

No driving the tractors on the roads.  No one could see where the road ended and the deep ditches on both sides began.  We traveled cross-country over winter wheat fields.  And let me tell you, a driver (my brother-in-law and the only one seated), plus five of us in the cab of that tractor was not a picnic on the plains of Kansas.  (Hint: Tractors in fields are not smooth-going.)  The girls were bounced around like billiard balls, and I lost track of how many times my head hit the top of the cab.

When the driver let us out across the road from home, we headed straight for our house---only we forgot about the ditch.  We couldn't see it.  I nearly lost the youngest in the 4 feet of drifted snow.  I kept telling my daughters that we were on a great adventure, and that someday we'd look back and laugh.  I chuckle now, but a laugh is hard to come by.

We're not the only ones who've been dumped on this year.  The Pacific Northwest has had more than its share, as has the East Coast, the South, the Midwest, and most of the country.  Really?  If I wanted Canadian weather, I'd move to Canada.  It's beautiful there and they know how to deal with snow and blizzards and cold and...  All those things I'm not so crazy about.

Frankly, Mother Nature, I've had enough, and I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one.  While Spring is not my favorite season---thanks to tornadoes---I really wouldn't mind if it came early.  This is one of the longest cold spells in winter that I can remember.  So cold, the City opted not to salt the streets to melt the snow and ice for two reasons.  Isn't that an oxymoron?

1. They're low on salt.  It's all sitting at the salt mines, fifty miles away, and the roads are too bad to go get it.  
2. It wouldn't do any good.  The temps have been in single digits, making the use of salt, well, useless.

But we'll thaw.  By the weekend, temps are expected to hit 50 degrees.  I'm not sure I want to look beyond that.  In spite of wishing for spring, we have at least five more weeks of winter.  I don't expect my feet to thaw until July.

What's your weather been like?  Have you been snowed in?  Spent far too much time clearing snow from your car so you can crawl to work, hoping you don't get stuck and/or no one slides into you?  Or are you basking in the Florida/Arizona/etc. sunshine?  (If so, a resounding raspberry to you. ;) )

A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unnecessary freezing of water. ~ Carl Reiner

Crunch Time

It seems as if I'm always crunched for time, but right now, it's at the point of crucial.  Deadline looms for the last of the Desperation books.  I'm a scene + one chapter + an epilogue from having it written.  That will be done by the end of the week, but then there's editing and polishing.  Deadline is the 24th.

This past weekend, I'd planned to be much closer to being finished.  Weekends are usually my best time to get caught up on word count.  Not this past Saturday and Sunday.  I'd forgotten about college basketball.  I didn't even make a note of it, and the schedules I'd printed seem to have buried themselves under quickly scribbled plot notes and snips of dialogue. When I realized my beloved Wildcats were playing, it was far into the game.  And since two granddaughters were here for basically the weekend (more bad planning on my part) and had commandeered the TV, I watched the last half of the game on my computer.  The game wasn't going well, so I missed the last few minutes to switch to another.  Thanks to friends on FB, I realized that my beloved #4-in-the-nation Shockers weren't playing in the evening, but were just beginning their game.  It wasn't televised, so I listened to the play-by-play on the radio.  This game had a much better outcome, with a 23rd straight victory.  GO SHOX!!!  But then that other State university was playing yet another beloved team, the Longhorns, and UT was leading by a wide margin at half-time.  Obviously a must-see and well worth the time.  I giggled for a couple of hours over that one.  An impromptu dinner at oldest daughter's house took up most of the evening, but I came home and hit the keyboard, at least finishing two more scenes.  Can we say 'dedication?'  Can we say 'panic?'

My intention on Sunday was to bury myself in getting words on paper.  I ended up spending more time on line edits for the August book than I'd planned, and time went by without much notice...except for that nagging in the back of my mind that I really needed to finish the line edits and get cracking on that new manuscript.  Then came the sad news that Philip Seymour Hoffman had died, as I eagerly awaited 8 p.m., when the CNN documentary, The 60s: The British Invasion, a lead-in to a new series, was to come on.  But PSH news kept that from happening, and it wasn't until 10 p.m.that the CNN docu finally aired.  I'm really looking forward to the full CNN The 60s series in May.  I truly enjoyed The British Invasion, listening and watching all the great bands and music from that era and how it all shaped, not only the music of today, but the world.

So this is my life at this point.  The usual running back and forth to schools to drop off and collect the g-kids, checking Facebook off and on during the day, and racing to that deadline.  A threatening snowstorm over the next few days may put a crimp in my crunch if school is closed due to weather.  Which would be better?  Refereeing 5 kids or having to drive through snow to get them to and fro?  Something tells me I won't get to choose.  Mother Nature sometimes has a lousy sense of humor.  I'm working on mine. ;)

The thing that would most improve my life is 27 hours in a day. I could meet all my deadlines. ~ Yoko Ono

Or not. 

A Little History of Home

Campbell Castle 1890

Call me weird, but I have a thing for history.  Local history, to be precise.  There are two places that tickle my interest.  One is Wichita, the city where I was born and spent my childhood.  The other is Clearwater, where my mother's family settled, after immigrating from Germany and where I finished growing up.

The reason for the first is probably because my dad told stories about Wichita when he was growing up.  Born in 1910, he remembered things that are no longer there.  Theaters, drug stores, street names that were changed along the way.  Later, after I married, my dad and my grand-father-in-law, who were only a few years apart in age, would sit and share memories.  Of course I don't remember everything, but all of them fascinated me and made me aware of how history changes.

1885 Occidental Hotel 

Last night, my #3 daughter tagged me in a photo on Facebook, with an old photo of a building that was known as the Occidental Hotel.  According to the information where she found the photo, the hotel "was one of the Old West's most famous and grand hotels in its day. The Occidental played host to numerous notorious guests (including General Sheridan and outlaw Frank James) and the storied poker games of Room 12."  That set me off to visit the website where the photo had appeared, and I've now wasted spent at least an hour looking at Then & Now photos.  I've driven by the "Now" building many times and knew it wasn't new.  What I didn't know was the history behind it.

For the past three or four years, I've gone on a local "ghost tour" of an area of the city that wasn't a part of the city in the beginning.  The Arkansas (pronounced Ar-kansas', not like the state ☺) River bordered the original town/city on the west.  Beyond that was an area known as Delano. Infamous for gunfights, brawls and prostitution, the river kept the notorious out of Wichita.  In fact, guns were checked at the bridge before entering Wichita from Delany. (photo below)  Yeah, gun control in the 1800s. ☺  I never new about this, until I went on the first ghost tour with my youngest daughter. We've since dragged other family members along with us, but that first visit was the best. There's a story about an 1873 gunfight between two saloon owners, "Rowdy" Joe and "Red" Beard, in which Rowdy shot and killed Red.  During the ghost tour, this is one of the stories that's told.  Red's ghost still haunts one of the buildings that is now a hair salon.  Many of the buildings there now were built in the 1870s.  While Wichita has it's Cowtown Museum (a living museum of original buildings moved farther up the river and includes re-enactments of the time), it's exciting to hear and read the stories and see photos of the "other" Wichita, especially because I spent my childhood only a few blocks south of Delano and never knew the history, although I'm sure my dad mentioned it.  These days, the Delano District includes shops, businesses, restaurants and art galleries.  A wonderful place to visit.

Wichita (now East Wichita) on the left, Delano (now West Wichita) on the right

My dad also talked about Ackerman Island, situated in the middle of the Arkansas River.  (large island on the middle right)  Not just a simple island, it held an amusement park, complete with a roller coaster.  A drive along McLean, which I take often to go to the far west side of the city and follows the west bank of the river, now shows a completely different river.  No islands, no old boathouse, where people rented small boats, canoes and paddle boats.  I can only imagine what that might have been like.

While Wichita doesn't have the history of Boston or Charleston and cities along the east coast and south, it does have some some interesting stories.  Okay, a lot that are interesting. :)  Carrie Nation visited our fair city and smashed a bar in one of the local hotels, for one.  Then there's Rowdy Joe and Red Beard...  Ah, history.

Just another look at my childhood memories and far far before that.  Check into your own hometown history and see what you can find.  You won't be disappointed!

The past actually happened but history is only what someone wrote down. 

~ A. Whitney Brown

Guess What Day It Is?

Awwww, you guessed it.  Yes, it's Wednesday, and as I type this, I'm almost to the halfway point.  Okay, of the daylight part of the day, that is.  But I don't get to sleep when the sun goes down.  I get to stay up and work.  Daytime is reserved for all those things that can't be done after 6 p.m.

My list today included a call to the bank, answering emails, checking out Facebook (which I really don't have time for, but...), a trip to get 6 items at the store  (only 5 were available), and the usual taking and bringing-back of small urchins.  There's more, here and there, but those were the main items.  All are done, except that taking and bringing-back thing.  Two trips down and two more to go.  Speaking of two, there are only 2 more days before Friday comes around again.

Now, I don't know about you, but for me, weekends fly by at the speed of sound.  Sunday is not my favorite day of the week because of that.  It means Monday morning is just around the corner, and life starts anew, once again.  I'd love to stretch out a Saturday by doing nothing, but that rarely happens.  Then again, if I weren't busy, I wouldn't know what to do with myself.

Last Saturday we watched basketball.  College basketball.  One team didn't win, but the other did, in an astounding game that had my mouth hanging open at the buzzer.  A real fingernail-biter.  The plan had been to clean or at least straighten my office.  Yeah, right.  It never seems to get crossed off the old To Do list.  But I did sort of clear the debris from the finished book and discovered that there really is a desk under all of that, not just a tall, flat pile of notes, timelines, character charts and storyboards.  Whoda thunk it?  The downside is that I can't find anything any better than I could before I cleared out the mess.

Watching TV has become a luxury.  It wasn't so bad during the summer.  Most of what I watch (a total of 4 shows and an occasional HBO or PBS series) weren't on.  Work did get done.  But now that those shows are back on, I'm finding that I'm still not watching. I'm 3 hours behind on Downton Abbey and don't know that I'll have time to catch up or even watch this week's show.

Going out to dinner or a movie?  What are those?  Dinner out is rare, except for a once or twice a month short drive for fast food.  And I'm not a big fan of fast food.  Unless it's Sonic ice cream.  It's been too cold for that. :(  And movies?  Like in a theater?  I haven't stepped inside one for over a year or even rented a movie for even longer.

So life, is dreary, although it isn't, really.  It's too busy to be dreary or boring or ho-hum.  But Wednesday Hump Days do provide at least a glimpse of something different than the usual list of things that must be done.  Saturday rolls around, and I allow myself to sleep in.  But then I have to, because Fridays nights are for writing and run right into very early Saturday mornings.  The brain must have rest!

I'm one scene ahead of the new writing schedule I started on Monday.  If I can keep this up, I won't have that dastardly and exhausting rush to the finish line aka deadline.  You bet I try to reach those small goals!  If not, I wouldn't see the light of day...except for those taking and bringing-backs.

Here's hoping your Hump Day is productive!  Do I hear a wheeeeee as we go down the slide to the weekend?

More SMART Goals on Friday. :)

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. ~ Douglas Adams

Fan Time

I'm picky about my sports, but then I'm female, and I can be.  I'm talking the three major sports played by high schools, colleges, and pros.  Even the non-pros, but probably because I became designated team scorekeeper in my 20s for what's called a "town team."  Those are teams made up of local players, past the age of high school and no longer in college, who can't give up the sport.

In high school, I was a member of the Pep Club.  Those went the way of granny dresses, when pep clubs and the male equivalents were deemed...  I don't know why.  By the way, the guys at our HS were called the Rowdy Rooters and had their own section in the bleachers.  Aptly named, because they did get rowdy.

But high school wasn't my first introduction to basketball.  My "big brother," the guy who I grew up next door to, taught me at a young age how to shoot a basketball.  Believe, I wasn't all that good.  I'm not much of sport participant, and more of a fan.

My dad didn't play sports.  For one thing, he was 5'2, and, when his dad died when my dad was ten, he worked at whatever job he could find that would add to the family's finances.  But he did love to watch sports.  Everything from football to bowling.  I, in turn, spent many Sunday afternoons watching with him.  My mom preferred baseball.  I remember her sitting in a precursor of a recliner, keeping score and stats on a pad of paper during the playoffs and World Series.  Yes, I had my own favorite baseball players.  Roger Maris (my fave of all), Mickey Mantle, Willie Mays, Hank Aaron...  The list goes on.  Later, I became a Dodgers fan.  I bled blue.

We went to basketball games when I was young.  Wichita had a National Industrial Basketball League team,  the Wichita Vickers.  I vaguely remember going to the games.  My mom liked telling the story of the game where, when she'd jumped up from her seat after an astounding play, she'd forgotten I was on her lap and dumped me on the floor.  Apparently it didn't dim my enthusiasm for the sport.

Football.  'Nuff said?  I'm a Dallas Cowboys fan and have been since high school.  I think it may have been because I loved watching Tom Landry coach. A real gentleman and a great coach.  Then came the Dream Team  --  Emmitt Smith, Troy Aikman, Michael Irvin, Daryl Johnston, and more.

But Saturday we basked in basketball.  Not only did my hometown college team (WSU) win, but
so did the team (KSU) we went to see play--the team that was expected to lose that particular game.  Five of our family attended that K-State game, front row floor seats behind the dance team and stat tables, with a huge screen overhead, just in case our view was blocked at any time, and we watched them beat the 10-1 team by ten points.  Excellent game!  And so much fun to be a part of the drenched-in-purple arena crowd.  I'm known to get a bit rowdy, while watching games--shades of the Rowdy Rooters, perhaps?--but I behaved myself.  Not a single "Booooo" crossed my lips after a questionable call.

WuShock  (and if you don't know what a wheat shock is, it's time to learn)

Willie Wildcat

What a great Christmas gift my oldest daughter gave us, in spite of the sleet and snow we dealt with going and coming.  It will be a Christmas time we'll always remember.

Best wishes for a wonderfully memorable Christmas this year!  May your heart be open to the love of beauty of the season.

Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home! ~ Charles Dickens

On the First Day of Christmas Vacation...

'Tis the Season to Be Grinchy

♪ ♫ ♪ On the first day of Christmas vacation, my family gave to me--♫ ♫ ♪
  ♪ 1 four-year-old who never stops talking or screaming
  ♫ 1 six-year-old who down't know how to speak without shouting
   ♪ 1 nine-year-old who can't understand that "no bouncing the soccer ball in the house" means NO BOUNCING THE SOCCER BALL IN THE HOUSE
   ♫ 1 eleven-year-old who has taken the art of arguing to a whole new level.


My youngest daughter put up our Christmas tree a little over a week ago.  She took it down last night.  That four-year-old thinks the decorations are toys to stick in the sofa, under the TV, or even out the front door.  The boys (6 & 9) think the trashcan is a basketball goal.  Correction: A soccer-ball goal, because they destroyed the basketball long ago.  I'm waiting for the sound of breaking glass.  I've already mopped up the overflow in the bathroom.  And the day isn't over yet, but at least it's half over.

I was born without an abundance of patience.  Or maybe I was, but it's all been used over the past 8+ years, since I offered my daughter of two children, at the time, childcare.  Then came another and another.  I raised four of my own, so I understand how caring for children can run the gamut from terrifying to terrific.  I didn't expect an apocalypse of disasters.  We had our own, many that could have been avoided, but yielded a lesson.  My two oldest daughters learned, after playing with and breaking something that didn't belong to them "for the last time," that mom had a breaking point.  Years later, one Pound Puppy is still missing an ear, and a Cabbage Patch doll an arm.  I can take a lot of abuse, but there's a limit.  They reached it that day, and it's something they've never forgotten.  What we have forgotten is what it was they broke to cause me to lose my cool.

Let's face it, mothers are human.  So are kids.  We all make mistakes, we all lose our temper, although as infrequently as possible.  I'm trying to hold on to mine today.  That, and my mind.

But tomorrow is Saturday, and the little darlings will be gone for the weekend in only a few hours.  I get a reprieve...until Monday, when we'll start all over again.  This year school is out for the holidays for seventeen days.  Yes, that's right, 17.  When I was in school--during the Dark Ages--we were lucky to get ten, and that happened when Christmas fell on Wednesday, as it does this year.

Wait!  There's no sound of a bouncing soccer ball, only the sounds of Family Guy, coming from the living room.  Oh, and a shout from the 6-year-old, but that's not uncommon.  They must be gathering strength for the next wave.  I, on the other hand, am dreaming of tomorrow, when I'll be attending the first college basketball game I've been to in thirty years.  Floor seats.  Under the basket.  On ESPN2.  MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!   I'll get to be the one screaming and shouting, jumping up and down, and maybe catching a basketball, although it might very well be in the face.

Such is life.  It's never a smooth road, but at least it's paved with good intentions and sprinkled with wonder.

'Tis the Season of Madness

It really doesn't change, this holiday madness time of year.  Some years it isn't too bad, but others make us want to crawl in bed and not climb out again until spring.

With Christmas only a week away, gasp...choke...faint and back to back deadlines looming into late February, the idea of crawling into a cave--hopefully a warm one--and staying there until sanity returns is whispering in the back of my mind.

Yes, life can be stressful, and holidays even more so.  There's never enough time.  There's never enough money.  There's never enough parking spots.  At the same time there's an abundance...of lists, chores, deadlines, wants and needs.  And yet we manage to do it, year after year, and actually survive.

If holiday stress is taking its toll on you this year, below are some quick, online tips to help lend a calming holiday for you and yours.  Simply taking time out to read them might help a little.  Giving thought to them might help even more.

So here they are, those tips to get you through the most stressful time of the year.  Click on the links to read more about each tip.

From Psychology Today...
10 Tools for Dealing with Holiday Stress and Depression

1. Keep your expectations balanced.
2. Don't try to do too much.
3. Don't isolate.
4. Don't overspend.
5. Mourning is appropriate at times.
6. Treat depression wisely
7. Watch your diet and get some exercise.
8. Be aware of the Post Holiday Syndrome.
9. Plan Ahead.
10. Learn forgiveness and acceptance.

Read more here.

5 Practical Tips To Deal With Holiday Stress: The RELAX Paradigm

1. Remember what the holidays are truly about.
2. Exercise.
3. Listen to music that you love.
4. Ask for help.
5. eXtricate yourself from unnecessary socializing.

Read more here.

from Psych Central...

Coping with the Holidays: Eight Ideas for De-Stressing the Holidays

1. Remember the spirits of the season.
2. Be a friend.
3. Remember the family members who are no longer present.
4. Discuss the issue of presents with your family.
5. Practice moderation in preparing holiday meals and consuming holiday goodies.
6. Plan enough time for shopping.
7. Understand that others may be stressed out.
8. Be grateful.

Read more here.

There are more tips, lists and articles at Psych Central's Coping with the Holidays.

Check the Mayo Clinic suggestions.

Stress, depression and the holidays: Tips for coping from the Mayo Clinic

1. Acknowledge your feelings.
2. Reach out.
3. Be realistic.
4. Set aside differences.
5. Stick to a budget.
6. Plan ahead.
7. Learn to say no.
8. Don't abandon healthy habits.
9. Take a breather.
10. Seek professional help if you need it. 

Read more here.

Wishing you and yours Seasons Greetings, a very Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays!

Christmas... is not an external event at all, but a piece of one's home that one carries in one's heart. ~ Freya Stark