The Missing In Action Thing

MONDAY MUSINGS
There was a point in the past ten days when I wasn't sure I'd be here.  This time last month, I was hit with what I thought was an asthma attack, something I haven't dealt with but a couple of times, and the most recent being four or five years ago.

A trip to a local pharmacy clinic netted me some meds and a bill that sucked up my quarterly royalties.  Because I was locked out of healthcare.gov by some kind of glitch, I have no health insurance.  Okay, I'm not whining.  It happened to a lot of people and will be taken care of as time goes by.  Until then, I'll do what I can and hope for the best.

The meds helped...for a while, then I felt worse, then a little better, then worse again.  Three weeks later, I went to a different local clinic because I was still having difficulty breathing that had become worse.  I was given a breathing treatment, meds, prescriptions and more, and spent more money.  A few hours later, I ruined my daughters' evening with a call to them at a concert, telling them I needed to go to the ER.  I.  Could.  Not.  Breathe.

With my oxygen level at a dangerous 82%, I was admitted to the hospital that Saturday night.  At that point in time, I didn't care what they did with me.  I was exhausted from trying to breathe and my hands wouldn't stop shaking.  Yes, a hospital visit is expensive, and without insurance, something I wouldn't do on whim or much of anything else, but I didn't feel I had a choice.  I signed my name and gave my care up to the wonderful people at the hospital.

Tuesday evening I came home, breathing easily and able to walk from one room to the other without tiring or gasping for air.  In fact, on Wednesday, youngest daughter and oldest granddaughter and I went on a treasure hunt, hiking along an historical bridge, looking for a medallion.  I'm not only back to normal, I'm better than I was.  I've stopped smoking.  Again.  (Third time is charmed, right?)

I had a lot of time to think in the hospital.  When there's even the smallest chance that you might not take another breath, you start to see your life in a new way.  Have I done the things I want to do?  Am I ready to pass on to whatever is or isn't out there?  My answer was NO.  I got a whole lotta livin' to do.

Thank you to all my family and super friends, who stopped by to visit, brought me a shake from Sonic, some books, a tiny rose bush, a handmade glitter-pic and kept me smiling.  I am blessed to have you all in my life.  And there's more life coming.  Count on it. :)

Somebody should tell us, right at the start of our lives, that we are dying. Then we might live life to the limit, every minute of every day. Do it! I say. Whatever you want to do, do it now! There are only so many tomorrows. ~ Pope Paul VI

Life Changes with Learning

Quicky Hail Storm March 15, 2014

It's been a crazy winter for everyone.  Because of it, we've all learned a new term: Polar Vortex.

Now, I'm sure this isn't something weather people suddenly came up with, but in all my years, I can't remember ever hearing it.  Yeah, that many years.  And now I sound like my mother. *grin*

As I posted on Facebook this past Saturday, I heard the rain, thought one of my car windows was down a couple of inches, and ran outside to roll it up.  I'd just opened the car door to climb inside, when the hail started.  Hail?  Oh, hail, yes!  And it was coming down hard and heavy.  Aha!  It's spring!  Well, for a while.  We had snow flurries during the night.  Or at least I heard we did.  Just a touch of winter to remind us that it's only March.  Don't get your hopes up.  Temps of 78 or so for a day don't mean anything.  Mother Nature enjoys teasing the mortals.

That's the micro version of life.  That's the kind of thing we notice.  But later that night and thanks to a friend on Facebook, I sought something much bigger.  Something macro.  Something huge, enormous, gigantic, (fill in your own adjective) that boggled my mind.  Yes, boggled.  I watched the first installment of Cosmos: A Space-time Odyssey.

Yeah, me, watching a science show.  That, in itself, is mind-boggling.  Before entering 6th grade, I loved
 science.  I loved it so much that I begged and pleaded for a microscope, which I got for Christmas when I was 11.  All the neighbor kids offered fingers for bloodletting, so we could see it on a slide under the microscope.  We found dead bugs and checked out their legs.  Bits of leaves and flower petals were scrutinized.  My life goal emerged.  I wanted to be a research scientist.  Jump forward to a year later, and I had a science teacher who totally burned me out on science.  I've never had the tiniest bit of interest in science since then.  Don't believe it?  Fast forward to July 20, 1969.  Does that date ring a bell?  The first man walked on the moon.  I remember leaving my bedroom and walking through the living room, while my parents, watching TV, asked where I was going.

"Out," I answered.  "Down to the park.  Wherever."
"Aren't you going to watch Neil Armstrong (and Buzz Aldrin) walk on the moon?"
"No."

I have no idea what they said after I closed the door behind me.  I'm sure there were sighs and the shaking of heads, followed by the bemoaning of what would become of me, more than likely.

My dad worked at Boeing for just short of 25 years (mandatory age 65 retirement) and was a part of that company's involvement in the Space program.  As a person who had only received a 7th grade education, he broadened his mind and learned more than I ever have with reading.  He knew a lot about a lot of things.  One of his favorite things to read was Carl Sagan's Cosmos.  That and National Geographic Magazine were his mainstay.  He loved to learn new things.

So there I sat on Saturday night,  watching a show on my computer that I wouldn't have dreamed of watching all those years ago, my eyes wide with wonder and astonishment.  Age and maturity sure do make a difference.  Afterward, I told my daughter how amazing it was, so she found it on TV, and we watched it together.  The second in the series aired on Sunday night, and we were there again, fascinated by everything we saw.  And we'll continue to watch.


I'm not going to debate the Bible vs. Science.  For me, the two can easily be interwoven.  For those who don't agree with that and would avoid watching Cosmos?  You're missing some of the most beautiful images ever produced by God, nature, and, yes, even man.  (P.S. It's on the Fox Network.)

Give it a try.  Check it out.  More information and previous episodes can be seen via computer at cosmosontv.com. Let me know what you think. ;)

That deep emotional conviction of the presence of a superior reasoning power, which is revealed in the incomprehensible universe, forms my idea of God. ~ Albert Einstein

Ring it Out, Ring it In

It's that time of year again.  The end of the year.  For most, it's a time of reflection on the past year to make room for improvements in the new year.

Of course we want the new year to be better than the one before.  Life is a cycle of ups and down,  good things and not so good.  We all know this, but when we're hunkering at the bottom of not so good, it's hard to remember that things change.

Millions of people will make New Year's Resolutions tonight.  I don't do that.  Each time I have, they've vanished into the stratosphere in only a matter of days.  I've learned to be more goal oriented, but even that could use some tuning, and not something as easy as fine-tuning.  I'm working on that.

I've decided to blame all the bad things this year on the number of the year, itself.  I mean, look at it.  See that 13?  No, I don't really believe the number 13 is bad luck.  Expecting bad luck simply draws it into the real world.  But it's a nice excuse on which to blame those bad things.

If I could have one wish, it would to be like J.K. Rowling.  Not so much because of the fame and wealth, but what I could do with those two things.  I have a friend who recently started working in a homeless shelter here in our "fair" city.  She started just in time for Christmas, and she told me about a little girl.  I don't know how old the girl is, but she'd wanted a doll for Christmas.  Disappointed when it didn't appear, the girl's comment was, "I wanted a doll, but Santa ran out of them before he got to me, and I got gloves."  I have no doubt those gloves were needed, but imagine the joy on that little girl's face, if Santa hadn't run out of dolls.

The shelter is in need of coats.  New, only, because laws don't permit "used clothing" in this situation.  If I had J.K. Rowling's bank account, I'd buy they each person there, young, old, or in-between, a coat.  And a doll for that little girl.  Maybe next year?

I've been blessed this year with lessons learned.  Several of them within the past two months.  Those are the things I want to focus on as 2014 plays itself out.  I guess that is a sort of resolution.  If it is, so be it.  Or, as Captain Picard always said, "Make it so."

I hope you can "Make it so" this year in whatever way you choose.  Because, you know, life is a succession of choices.  When it comes to good ones, make it so.

Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson 

School is in Session

When we think of learning, we think of school.  But that's really narrow-minded.  School is only one part of learning and not even the first part.  We begin to learn the moment we're born.  We shouldn't stop until we breathe our last breath.

We learn by instruction, doing, and keeping our eyes, ears, and minds open.  That last--keeping ourselves open, is probably the most important, because without it, instruction and doing will often fail.

I'll be the first in the line that's formed for those who have learned by mistake.  That doesn't mean I give up.  I keep trying.  I keep learning.

Knowledge is like the tip of an iceberg.  What we know is above the water, and it may seem abundant, but below the water is the real stuff.  That's what we don't know, but should learn.  Add the ocean water surrounding it, and it seems endless.  Learning is endless.

One of the ways I learn, other than by all those mistakes, is sharing with others.  Yesterday evening, I attended my critique group meeting.  There are four of us, all writers.  Two of us are published, and the other two are on their way to being published.  None of us would ever say we know everything.  All of us share and continue to learn.

How do we learn?  For me, it's three things.  Seeing, doing, and sharing.

Seeing

As I'm sure I've stated before, I'm visual.  Seeing things helps.  That's why I always took copious notes in school.  Hearing it just didn't do the trick.  Writing it and seeing the words or drawings or whatever was needed, helped embed it in my brain aka learn.  I find that a bit strange, because I loved being read to as a child.  Of course, once I learned to ready on my own, it changed and became better.

I've critiqued with others for over fifteen years in both written and verbal form.  Written works better for me, whether on the giving or getting end.  In our group, we each read our work to be critiqued.  Sure, I can do it, but give me a paper with print on it, and I'll do a much better job.  Still, something is better than nothing, and sometimes hearing something will make a good thing or a not so good thing jump out.  Yes, we writers are storytellers, but we tell our stories with the written word.  I am eternally grateful to writers.  I might miss the good stuff, otherwise.

Doing

When I came home from critique group last night, my daughter was watching a spin-off of Dance Moms on TV.  I don't watch a lot of TV, myself.  I have a few favorites that are must-sees, but I don't watch every night.  Not that I've always been that way, but to have the time to write and read, I gave up a lot of TV.  One of the judges--if you've ever watched Dance Moms, you'll know who this is--never sugar coats anything.  She's blunt, sometimes to the point of rude.  But the point I see and that she made on the show last night was that the young people who are dancing at competitions are professional dancers.  It isn't easy, it often isn't fun, and it takes a lot of hard work, learning routines, steps, and all the other things that go along with being professional.

After the program was over, I turned to my daughter and said,  "If they can't take the judge's criticism, they need to find a new dream."  Harsh?  Yes.  True.  Yes.  Those young people will have to learn that there will always be criticism.  "It's like getting rejections," I said.  "It hurts.  It can really hurt.  And often we (writers) will quit or at least want to.  Many of us don't.  We simply try harder, keep learning and working toward our dream, whatever it may be."

That's "doing."  Those revisions, those critique groups, those contests we enter, and those rejection letters we collect on the way are all a part of learning.  We learn and grow and make changes.

Sharing

After joining RWA and my local writers' group, I discovered that the people involved in writing, especially romance writers, are over-the-top generous.  The sharing and helping goes on wherever you look.  Conferences and conference workshops, writers' groups, critique groups and writing friends are always there to lend an ear, a suggestion, a hand to pull us up when we're down.

I've already stated that I'm a pantster turned plotter.  Over almost twenty years of writing, I've created and learned how to plot in a way I can understand.  Like me, it isn't perfect.  It didn't come instantly.  Everyone has his/her own way to do it.  I'm always looking for ways to tweak "my way," especially when I hit a bump in the writing or plotting.  I ask others how they go about planning their story.  Often, there's a small grain of something I can use to help make my plotting and writing better.  And I'll share the way I do it, too.  Isn't that what sharing is all about?

Never, never, never be afraid to ask questions.  That's one of the best ways to gain knowledge.  And when the table is turned and a question is asked, offer your own experiences, good and bad.

We'll never know everything, and that's okay, because it's nice to keep learning.  An "aha" moment is worth it's weight in gold.  Happy learning!

The world is a university and everyone in it is a teacher.  Make sure when you wake up in the morning you to go school. ~ Bishop T.D. Jakes

Post Holiday Reflections

I had every intention of writing a blog post yesterday, first thing in the morning.  After that, my plan was to write.  And write some more.  But plans often go awry, and I ended up doing updates on a website that took longer than planned, and then I started reading the blogs of other writers.  By the time I started writing, it was late, and the evening was filled with booms and bangs.  Let's face it, except for watching a well-done, aerial fireworks display, I'm not a fan of the noise of firecrackers and the like, and I opt out of the things that sell from a tent.

Instead of sharing my distaste of fireworks for fear that someone might think I'm unpatriotic (I'm not!), I'd like to share some of the blogs I follow on both a regular and an irregular basis.  There's good stuff out there!  Sometimes I'll find something that makes me stop and think or spurs me to write my own blog on the same subject.  Yes, the latter requires thinking, too.

My first blog stop is often at Kristen Lamb's Blog.  She's smart, she's funny, she's spot on.  And she's learning, just as we all are.  Kristen not only shares her trials and triumphs, she shares hints and tips that she learns along the writing and publishing path.  Let's face it.  Writing can be lonely.  Writing can be difficult.  But knowing that others experience many of the same things can make those negatives more easily to except and change.  And you'll love the pix she posts of her son, The Spawn.

The next on my list of blogs to visit is Joe Konrath's  A Newbie's Guide to Publishing.  Joe has been writing and publishing for many years, and he knows the business.  I don't make it to Joe's blog every day, but when I do, I have a lot of reading to catch up on, whether posts from Joe or from his guests.  Experience is the best teacher, whether yours, mine, or the experience of several others, and we can learn from all of it.

If you're serious about epublishing and are considering publishing your own ebooks, JW Manus's Blog is one you'll want to follow.  Jaye shares information on a variety of things regarding formatting your book for epublishing.  Jaye has tips, tricks and how-to's for converting your book to ebook and where to find more information.

If you're writing romance, don't miss Trish Wylie's 2009 blog series, Not at Nationals - Common Writing Mistakes.  ("National" meaning Romance Writers of America's annual National Conference)  It's fabulous!  Unbelievably, I found it last week. SMH  I'm serious, folks.  Trish shares a lot in a little space.  A lot of good stuff.  A LOT!!

Another blog I don't visit nearly as often as I should.  That's probably because I keep forgetting to bookmark or follow it.  Jane Friedman's tag line, Writing, reading, and publishing in the digital age, says it all.  As she says in her blog bio, she's been "working in the publishing business since the late 1990s."  Who better than someone who knows the ins and outs, goods and bads?

Everyone has their favorite blogs.  The above of are some of mine.  But I'm always looking for more, so I'd love to know your favorites.  Maybe I'll add them to my list. ☺

Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.  – Dale Carnegie